Hermeneutic Press

Heremeneutic Press is a genuine faux publishing house that burst onto the scene in 1972 during the height of the Silver Age with such titles as 'Mutant Attack Pigs Gone Wild' and 'Tommy and the Magic Bell Bottoms'. Fueled by the burgeoning counter-culture and guided by principle, Hermeneutic Press set about challenging the status quo. No more same old, same old. It was time to tackle new issues. Blaze new paths. Try new and unconventional directions. Entertain and explicate.

In issue 4 of Immovable Man, Hermeneutic Press dealt, for the first time, with the issue of missing the bus. It was a poignant, deeply affecting story. It was also totally unexpected.

The issue rocked the comic book world to its pulp paper foundations, and nothing would ever be the same again.

Hermeneutic hysteria swept North America, and Hermeneutic President and CEO B. Barry Horst had to make public appearances all over the country in order to prevent social collapse. Thousands of commuters deliberately missed their buses. Everyone wanted to be part of the Immovable Man story.

When asked to explain the popularity of this envelope pushing property, Barry B. Horst said, "People need heroes they can identify with. They need to be able to put themselves in the heroes' shoes. And when they do, they want to know if that hero had Athelete's Foot. These are questions people are interested in. Yes, some others have attempted to take this sort of approach. That's true. We're not the first. But by God, we've gone the farthest. It's high time comics reflected our everyday lives. Excuse me, I have an itch on my foot."

People were tired of muscle bound, Randian supermen leaping about in Spandex, saving the planet.

They wanted to see muscle bound, Randian superman dealing with laundromats, debt, hair in their pizza, and hamstrings. And maybe nasal congestion. Or herpes.

Hermeneutic Press listened. And then we delivered. Big time.

Dozens of new titles were produced, featuring a slew of heroes the likes of which had never been seen before.

Amazon Warrior debuted in 1980, and combined action, massive mammaries, and the issue of daycare in the ancient era. How does a strong, independent warrior woman balance pillaging with parenting? The Laundry Room dealt with the lives of a dozen young, hip twentysomethings and the laundry room they all share in the basement of their apartment building. Not a single Spandex clad hero was to be seen in the entire series. The Inanimate Chair was a genre breaking experiment about a sentient but immobile chair that had herpes. Nobody expected it. Certainly not anyone sitting on it. Nor was anyone prepared for Stog: Rebel Painterbot who defied both his programming and the overbearing Overbots in order to find his artistic muse. Even when the company sent hordes of armed and armoured Orderbots and bolt bedecked Battlebots after him, he did not waver. He had to find his beloved Musebota! It became one of the most popular romance stories of the new millennium and an instant classic.

Hair In My Pizza ran an incredible 40 issues and sold better than anyone expected, allowing Hermeneutic Press to rapidly expand and just 10 years later, add another full time employee, bringing the grand total to two. The office became overcrowded and the occasional fight broke out. Just another challenge for the talented Hermenauts to overcome.

Within a few years, new series such as Rex Libris, published by SLG, and Nil: A Land Beyond Belief would debut, garnering Hermeneutic Press further recognition. With the addition of My Breasts Came From Mars the reputation of the company would be firmly established in the consciousness of the public.

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© James Turner 2008